Letting Loose
by scullyseviltwin
Summary: She was ready to forget all about Gil Grissom and the sluggishness he painted over her life, but then again, she thought that way a lot.
1. Letting Loose

Title: Letting Loose

Author: ScullyAsTrinity

Rating: PG-13...ish... ness.

Category: Slight angst, humor, romance.

Disclaimer: Do you have any disclaimers I've written? Do you KNOW how hard it is coming up with new and interesting ways to say I DON'T OWN THEM? So frustrating...

Notes: Thanks to Lauren AKA TriplePirouette, who's been there from X-Files to CSI. Who's been my fan ficcie buddy...

DSUOphelia5: And like all drunks do- called him on her cell phone, but just ended up crying into the phone, so he comes to pick her up

BNLXPhile12: Ohhh I've done that! It's soooo true!

She tossed a shot of the amber liquid back. It burned a fierce trail down her throat and she felt free. She felt unbridled. She was confident enough to meet up with an old friend and leave her dark, dank apartment and hit the strip with the bright lights and the fake smiles.

The amber liquid was enough to make her dare to show her midriff. It was enough to make her walk into a bar with her friend, Vanessa and dance with a random man. It was just enough to make her sit in a chair and get her navel pierced. It was enough to make her flirt and act coy.

It was enough to leave her with a monster of a hangover. One so bad that she swore that she would never drink again.

She, of course, wondered how the small diamond stud had gotten on her bellybutton, but she didn't take it out. She studied it endlessly and it, in the end, withheld the Sara Sidle approvement test. She thought it made her look sexy.

The next Friday it was the same. She contemplated taking a few shots before she even got a call, but decided against it. When she did get the call she was surprised that she found herself agreeing to go out again. Two weekends in a row. She hadn't made a move this bold since her freshman year at college, and that experience had been enough to deter her for the rest of her life.

Nick wondered why it had been so easy to get Sarah to go out with them but he didn't mind. None of them had really seen her, seen her alive... in months.

A black suburban had rolled up to her apartment complex and beeped and the inhabitants were surprised to be met with a very strange vision: a smiling Sara Sidle. A smiling Sara Sidle, all color and flare. Life coursing through her veins, apparent in her words.

Something was in her and she seemed so unlike she had been before. She wasn't devoid of life, she was willing to socialize with her coworkers. She was ready to walk arm in arm with Nick into the club. She was willing to do tequila shooters with them until she was dizzy with the rush.

She was ready to forget all about Gil Grissom and the sluggishness he painted over her life, but then again, she thought that way a lot. She spoke with Catherine as any normal woman would. She followed her out onto the dance floor at some point during the evening. She ground with Warrick. She even indulged Greg in some dancing.

The fact that they were all tipsy made it far more fun. Each and every one of them lost their inhibitions, and danced like idiots. Sweat began on their brows and trickled down their cheeks when they tipped their heads back to laugh. Catherine tossed her hair and felt the heat on her neck. Warrick moved closer to her and felt it also.

They were swallowed by the crowd.

Sara felt the sweat beginning to roll down between her cleavage, but continued to move in between the two men. Nick bent down as close to her as he could and yelled into her ear. "Where did my baby sister go?" He moved back and smiled.

"I checked her at the door." She replied coyly and flipped her hair, grabbed Greg's hips and started to move. The younger man was surprised and raised his eyebrows at Nick, almost in terror. Nick simply laughed and grabbed Sara's hips from behind and swayed along as well.

"Good time?" Greg yelled, leaning in close to Sara, smelling her.

"Great time." She said and winked and spun around into Nick's arms. He laughed, and she laughed, and for a moment, they all took to dancing like complete idiots.

Warrick and Catherine returned minutes later, drinks in hand, sweat covering their exposed skin. "This place is insane." Catherine shouted, clinking her glass with Warrick's and winking at him. She swiveled her hips and spun around. "I like it."

"You're back!" Sara shouted, letting go of Greg, much to his dismay. She reached her arm out and grabbed Catherine's. The blonde smiled, loving the new wild side of her co-worker. She grinned wider, and without turning, shoved her drink into Warrick's hand and moved into the crowd with Sara, wanting to see just how crazy she would allow herself to get.

The three men stood in the center of the chaos and watched in fascination. "What has gotten into that girl?"

"More like what has gotten out." The Texan replied, clapping Greg on the back and making his way to the bar. The two others stood for one more moment, eyes lingering, and followed him.

On the floor, Sara threw her hands above her head and shook it from side to side, causing her curls to tangle into one another. Catherine did the same, moving backward and getting low to the floor. Sara reached out and grabbed her hand, pulling her back up as she swiveled her body.

And suddenly, something on Sara's hip tickled. Something was tickling her hip. Letting go of Catherine's hand, she reached down and snatched her cell out of her hip carrier.

"Sidle." She shouted happily, making eye contact with Catherine, who rolled her eyes but continued to dance.

"Sara, where are you? You said you'd be done with the file by tonight." Grissom said, his voice incredibly irritated. He stood outside Sara's apartment, quite ready to leave, case file in hand.

"Whoops."

"What?" He struggled to hear her over the loud music in the background. Catherine moved up to her and tried to pluck the cell phone away, but she instead spun around and continued talking."

"Oh! 'S in the mailbox Griss." Hearing Sara utter her boss's name, Catherine spun around, her eyes wide.

"But... it's your night off." He was at a loss for words, and sounded rather indignant. He expected her to be home, home looking over case files, listening to her police scanner. She generally was. He knew because he often drove by her apartment after shift and on her nights off, just to alleviate himself of the constant worry that he felt for her when she wasn't near him.

"I'm out!" She grinned again, and Catherine shot her one to match, expecting her to hang up. When she didn't, Catherine took her hand and guided her off the dance floor.

Nick noticed the alarmed look on the approaching blonde's face and the goofy look on the brunette's and moved over the both of them. Catherine squinted, pointed to the cell and cocked her head. "Guess who."

Nick chuckled and plucked the phone from Sara's hand. She protested and jumped for it, but he held it out of her reach, as a schoolyard bully would do with someone's glasses. He laughed at her, stuck his tongue out and fended her off with his other hand. Raising his brows, he slowly brought the phone to his lips. He was more than three sheets to the wind, they all were, so when he spoke, it was with a note of random happiness that made Greg giggle.

"I wonder who this could be." Nick said into the phone, moving his head from side to side, staring pointedly at Sara, who was glaring at him, her face inflamed.

"...Nick?" Grissom asked, noting the distinct southern twinge in the man's voice.

"One and the same." He replied, sipping a beer. "And you are calling our Sara because?" For a moment, Nick wondered if he would have ever have acted in such a way towards his boss if he wasn't in such a state of inebriation. Then, he remembered he didn't much care and waited for Grissom's response.

"What's going on? There's... I can't really hear you." Grissom said, blocking an ear and bending over, walking around attempting to hear better.

"Nothing's going on. We're out. At a club. Dancing. Drinking." Nick said, and lipped 'Grissom' to Greg, who was cocking his head in question. Greg's eyes lit up and he nodded, smiling and ordering a shot of tequila.

"Well, Sara's doing most of the dancing and Greg's doing most of the drinking but... hey, whatever."

"Right, well..."

"What're ya calling Sara for anyway? It's her night off..." Nick said suggestively. Sara heard the mischief in his voice, knowing where he was going to take the conversation and spun around in anger. She barreled her way into the crowd, Nick calling after her.

"Nick, what's wrong?" Grissom asked, irritated beyond belief, wanting nothing more than to go home and read over the case file.

"Aw, Sara's pissed, I think she just left." The Texan said dejectedly, upset at himself.


	2. Enter Grissom

A/N: Yes, chapter two before I even get any responses. I must reiterate that this is quickly disintegrating into bad-fic. And that makes me sad because I CAN'T STOP WRITING IT! Okay, back to good-fic. Back to Stalemate for awhile. :::wipes brow:::

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"What? She's leaving?" Grissom's back straightened, worried once more. "Where's she going?"

"Coat check? Bathroom? Getting a cab? I don't know man, she just bolted." Nick said, the last shot he had taken finally taking hold of his hazy brain.

"Nick, Nick-" Grissom shouted when the reception started to go and the line became fuzzy. "Nick, where are you guys? Who's there? Is there anyone sober?"

Nick looked around, seeing drinks in everyone's hands. "I don't think so. We planned on grabbing a cab home. So..."

"Where are you?"

"Oh, we're... we're uhh... Cath, where are we again? Suede? Leather? Couldn't be Cotton." Greg laughed at Nick who appeared baffled. He shouted over to Catherine who was leaning up to whisper something into Warrick's ear. "Catherine!"

"Uhhh, Satin? Yeah, Satin." She quickly went back to seducing Warrick.

"We're at Satin. It's a club, a nightclub... Sara, are you crying?" Nick went on, vaguely remembering that he had his supervisor on the phone. But she spun around and made her way to the far side of the bar. The club in front of him became a sea of color before he balanced himself. His eyes watered for a moment, so he passed his hand over them.

"She's crying? Why is she crying Nick? What happened?" Grissom was already out of Sara's hallway, headed for his car. He haphazardly located the keys in his coat pocket and had some difficulty fitting them into the lock. "How drunk are you?" Grissom prodded, finally succeeding in turning his car on.

"Well, I'm pretty sure, as of now..." Nick blinked hard and rubbed his eyes quickly. "I'm thinking that Greg is a pretty good dancer. I'm pretty gone boss."

Grissom sighed, heavily. So heavily that even Nick could hear it. "Okay, I'll be there soon." He didn't even allow for the young man's reply, hanging up his phone and tossing it into the passenger seat. Grissom couldn't quite fathom why he was handling the situation the way he was.

If Grissom had bothered waiting for his reply, he would have heard Nick once again greet Sara, stalking towards him with a shot of tequila in each hand. "Nick Stokes, I hate you." She said, shoving one of the shots into his hand, leaning in, licking the sweat from his neck and snatching the lime out of Greg's teeth. The young man's eyes lit up, but took the gesture as nothing more than friendly, as Sara took a wedge of lime between her lips for Nick.

"You stopped crying." He said happily.

She looked at him strangely. "I was crying? Oh, no, not anymore." She smiled drunkenly and pointed at him.

"Phone please." She stuck out her hip to him and he replaced the device with a bit of fumbling. He returned to his standing position with a triumphant smile. She smiled back at him, a smile tinged with sadness.

"Not again, okay?" She asked, her eyes glittering, her cheeks on fire.

"You're the boss, sis." He said timidly as possibly. She nodded as a show of acceptance and grabbed Greg's hand once more. He smiled affectionately and motioned with his head for Nick to join them. Shaking the haze out of his head, he did.

Once they were out there, Nick pulled her to him rather quickly, his fingers skimming over her stomach as he did so. There, he felt something metallic and spun her around to face him. He wore a look of astonishment as he lifted the hem of her shirt to reveal a tiny navel ring, one that was undetectable under the fabric of her clothing. She made no notice of his voyeurism and spun back around, continuing to dance.

Nick stood stationary for a moment, then grabbed Greg's attention and pointed to his co-worker's stomach. Greg's eyebrows shot up, meeting Nick's eyes, and then following Nick's line of vision to Sara's stomach. The younger man gasped and grinned, almost laughing.

Nick cleared his throat and spoke. "Hey, don't you need a parent's signature to get one of those?"

Sara spun around quickly, grinning. "Well, my mommy said if I got an A in science I could get one." She winked at him devilishly, eliciting a whistle from Nick. Greg shook off his hands as if they were hot, took her hand and spun her around.

"Let's go to the other room." Greg suggested, having had enough of the techno.

"Which 'other room'? There are five!" Nick said.

"Rock, let's do rock. I wanna see Sara try to headbang." Greg jumped up and led the way out of the techno of the club and back into the rock room.

Greg led the way, holding onto Sara's hand, who was holding onto Nick. There, in the middle of the dance floor, they bumped into Catherine and Warrick, jumping up and down, looking like complete morons. Greg shook his head, this was a whole different type of dancing, one that took skill Greg put out his hand to still Warrick and get his attention. He stopped his jumping, and Catherine, realizing she was jumping all alone, stopped as well.

"How'd you end up here?" The lab tech inquired looking from one CSI to the other.

"I... I don't know actually." Catherine said, shrugging jovially, grabbing Greg's hand, attempting to dance with him. Just as she did, the song ended and another began. It was a remix, something easier to dance to, but still rock.

"Oh. Oh!" Sara exclaimer, the alcohol having long before seeped into her bones, making everything a bit more fun to her. "Love this song!" She said. Greg turned around to face her. "Me too!" He genuinely meant it, he did love the song.

"Come on!" Sara shouted. She held Greg's hands in her own as they jumped around to the beat of the music. Nick soon joined in, figuring if he made an ass of himself he could blame it on the alcohol. Catherine laughed and threw her head back, shoving Warrick into the frenzy.

'I'm packed and I'm holding, I'm smiling, she's living, she's golden and she lives for me, she says she lives for me...'

"She goes down on me!" Sara and Greg screamed at each other, each mouthing the words and they moved, in a state of pure euphoria.

At some point, Catherine had grabbed her hands and begun swinging her around. The two of them shook their heads in time, throwing their hair around manically. Sara continued to sing along, being passed from person to person as everyone was. "I want something else..."

As Sara bumped into Nick, he was jolted back to reality. "Oh shit." He cursed and stopped moving all together. She bumped into him again and noticed her wasn't dancing and she stopped.

"What's up Nick?" She asked, her eyes twinkling but worried.

"Grissom."

"What about him?"

"He's coming...here."

"Excuse me?" Catherine also stopped moving and turned a slight glare at Nick

"Why!?!" She shouted, getting into his face.

"Something about Sara's night off and her crying but... not." His eyes clouded over, confused. "Hey, hey, hey, wait! You shoved the phone into my hand. If anyone's to blame for this it's you Cat!" She continued to glare at him, but thought about what he had to say and realized that it was true.

Greg, though thoroughly hammered, felt the tension that was overcoming them all. Sara was sad, Nick was confused, Catherine was pissed, and Warrick... just really didn't seem to care.

"Hey Cath," She turned to him quickly, her anger finally beginning to dissipate." Our little Sara is hiding a secret!" The drunken Greg said giddily and poked Sara in the stomach. She squeaked and turned to smack him in the arm.

"Hmm, I do like a secret." Catherine drew out predatorily, advancing on the brunette. "Give it up." She demanded, but Sara moved back and crossed her arms over her stomach in refusal. Nick wanted to join in the fun, so he reached out and tickled her, causing her to go nuts, throwing her arms in the air. Greg pointed to her stomach and Catherine gasped.

"What did you do?" She screeched, somewhat pleasantly surprised, somewhat horrified.

"What? What happened?" Grissom appeared behind Nick, disoriented by the changing lights and the loud music. The five others turned to stare at him in disbelief. He was completely out of place standing in the middle of the floor in his work clothes. Catherine grinned and merely laughed at him.

"Nothing happened. Though Sara got a piece of metal... inserted into her stomach!"

Thinking scientifically, his face became stricken and he grabbed Sara's arm and pulled her closer to him. He gazed at her stomach, a flicker of light gleaming off of her navel. His eyes darkened, just a bit, and only Catherine saw it because she was the only persona genuinely interested to see what his reaction would be.

"Oh." He said, and frowned. "I thought..." Grissom trailed off and turned back to Nick. "I thought something was wrong!"

"It was!" Nick said as he gazed down at the dance floor and then back at his boss. "Now it's not."

Grissom nodded slowly and looked amongst the group, attempting to keep his eyes away from Sara's navel. He couldn't. Sara caught him staring and moved her hips, just slightly so the skin of her stomach moved over the muscles that were flexing.

Grissom wet his lips and looked at Sara's eyes quickly, finding them dark and wanton. He disregarded the look and turned to Catherine. "Okay, bye." he said quickly and moved through the crowd, attempting to make his way to the door, but Catherine stopped him with a hand on his shoulder.

"No Gil, stay, the whole gang's here." Warrick's eye widened at Catherine's words but he said nothing.

"Yeah boss!" Nick piped in, and Greg perked up too.

"I'll get you a drink." he said cheerily and moved off to the bar and was swallowed by the crowd.


	3. It's All Fun and Games Until

A/N: Ahh, jury duty tomorrow, so I thought I'd spit this out before I get all that hostility injected into my system. Enjoy the bad-fic people, and thanks to all my reviewers. I love you all!

Also… lotsa Garbage music in this chappie. Love Garbage, live them.

Greg returned in no time, being as wired on alcohol as he was on coffee. He shoved a frosted glass into Grissom's hand and grinned. "I figured you for a scotch man." He said, bouncing on the balls of his feet, shaking his head to the music, not exactly connecting the fact that he was acting insane with the fact that he was acting insane in front of his boss and mentor.

Grissom took the glass with a raise of his eyebrow and scanned the crowd. An accident waiting to happen, he thought, and peered down at the amber liquid.

Catherine grinned. "So you're staying Gil?" She was intensely amused to see him out of his element.

"Uh, no." He said, handing the drink to Warrick, who looked at it and then back up to him. Grissom gave a fake half-smile and turned around once more, this time walking quicker away from his group of co-workers and the one person he knew he couldn't resist if alcohol was involved.

"Uh, uh, uh." Catherine chastised easily, reached out and stopping him once more, gripping his forearm and leading him back to the crowd. Warrick smirked at Catherine's prowess where Grissom was concerned. Grissom, however, wore a look of homicide.

"Catherine Willows, you know I can fire you..." He said matter-of-factly. She smirked and took Warrick's arm in hers as a brave show of bravado. Warrick gaped at her, and she met his eyes, smiling sweetly, calming his nerves. Griss picked up on the show of affection and raised an eyebrow, but chose to ignore it.

As much as Grissom's being wished to flee from the loud music, the gyrating bodies, the people soaked in vodka, he couldn't get his mind to stop thinking about Sara's-no, the team's-well being. So he stood in place, his stomach jumping around inside his body.

At that moment, Nick grabbed Cat around the waist and began to sway with her, but found the beat off. He frowned. He nearly fell over as he released her, Cath falling forward into Warrick's arms. She could have cared less that her boss was there, she was having a rare bit of fun. The fact that she had consumed far too much alcohol hadn't even crossed her mind.

"Back in the other room, people!" Greg ordered, sensing Nick's discomfort at the odd beats the rock music provided. Nick smiled. "Yeaaaaah. Let's go." He piped up, quite literally forgetting that Grissom was there, seeing him only as another person that had seemed to infiltrate the group he was part of.

The other's followed him, Grissom last, being dragged after them all by Catherine, who seemed quite adamant to get him to stay and have a good time. If both of his hands were free he would have pressed them to his head in order to force him to gain control of his mind. Instead, he followed blindly along, one hand in Catherine's, one hand clutching an expensive glass of scotch.

The lights in the next room were much dimmer, the people much more calm and there wasn't as much jumping around. Grissom visibly relaxed, his hand softening inside of Catherine's. She paused to look back at him briefly but continued to follow the others into the middle of the floor. As soon as Greg was sure he was satisfied with a spot, he began to dance, the others following suit easily.

Everyone except for Grissom. He simply stood amongst the movement and observed. No one seemed to notice or care.

A new song replaced the one they had begun dancing to almost immediately. Sara smiled, recognizing the song and grabbed Greg's hand, spinning him around quickly, almost making him fall. Nick laughed and grabbed her hips, her own hands once again reaching out for Greg's. The three of them danced in harmony, as Warrick and Catherine swayed slowly to the upbeat song.

Grissom felt intensely out of place but couldn't help observing his off-the-clock coworkers.

"Ahhhh, livin' without you. Ahhhh, I know all about you. I have run you down into the ground. Spread disease about, all the time. Ahhhh. Used to adore you. Ahhhhhh. Couldn't control you..."

Grissom noticed that everytime the accented singer sang the "ahhhh" portion of the song, that Sara swiveled her hips to the extreme, Nick matching her movements exactly. He raised a brow at the erotic picture they painted, but that thought was washed away as Sara spun to face him and made a mocking gesture with her mouth, causing Nick to laugh.

As she did, the music changed, the same singer's voice echoing briefly from the mix the DJ was creating. Sara shook her head and threw her hair. Her hand was caught by Warrick who brought her close to him for a moment. She moved over his knee and he moved into her, grabbing her hands and pulling them over her head. Catherine reached out and grabbed them, bringing the woman close to her.

Greg raised and interested brow and Catherine initiated a languid dance. The singer's voice continued to echo, no words yet being spit from the speakers. The beat of the music, however, was primal enough for the two women to dance together, causing their onlooker's jaws to drop... including Grissom.

He watched as Sara, eyes lidded, swiveled around Catherine, the blonde responding to her partner's movements. His eyes slid languidly down her body, his mind all the while screaming at him to stop, stop looking, stop feeling and most certainly stop drinking the double scotch that he still held in his hand.

"Pu-pu-pu-pu...puuuuuuuuu..." The music pulsated to a climax. "Push it." Everyone who wasn't dancing began to, again, with the exception of Grissom. When the chorus came, everyone but Warrick sang along. "This is the noise that keeps me awake, my head explodes and my body aches."

He was sure that his face heated up when Greg laid his hands over her hips and slid them down. Yet, she didn't seem to care, it all seemed to be part of the dance, if he could even call it such. Sara's head fell back against the younger man's shoulder and she smiled. He followed suit and whispered something down into her ear. At first she smiled, but then, as the words sunk in, she snapped her head up and peered directly at Grissom.

"He's staring at you." Greg had whispered. The words made her feel wonderful, until she remembered who he was talking about.

Her brown eyes peered into his but she decided that she didn't care, not then, not while she was having so much fun. So that's what she decided to do, have some fun with him. She giggled, a severely un-Sara like reaction and grabbed Nick, who spun around toward her, stumbling. He smiled at her giggling face and grabbed her in his arms, dancing with his forehead against hers.

She swayed, but not to the music, she swayed in his arms, her eyes glazing over, her head lolling on her shoulders. Grissom noticed her change in posture and stepped up, grabbing her hips, then changing his mind and placing them firmly on her ribs. She blinked rapidly, attempting to steady herself. "Nick..."

"Sara..." He trailed off and stopped moving. His eyes were concerned, his hands clutching hard at her hips, making sure that although Grissom was holding her, she wouldn't fall.

"How much has she had Nick?" Grissom asked sternly, refusing to take his eyes off of her face. Nick looked to his supervisor with frightened eyes.

"I don't know, she left me for awhile, she coulda-" As he spoke, Sara went limp in their arms, humming low to the music, completely out of it. Grissom gave Nick a stern look as if Sara's particular state of inebriation was his fault. Nick blinked and stood still, not sure how to act, not exactly sure if he could act in any particular manner in the state he was in.

"I'm-" Grissom began and hoisted Sara up a bit. "I'm going to take her home." Grissom stated, wincing and began the difficult task of easing Sara out of the crowd.


	4. Homeward Bound

A/N: Welcome back loyal readers! For this installment, I'm handing out hot cocoa (made with milk too, not that powder crap) and homemade cookies. Perhaps that will prompt you to review? I can only hope…

P.S…. hurrah for tomorrow! Last day of the semester… can you GUESS what I'll be doing over winter break? I already have an idea for a new fic…

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She clutched to him unknowingly as he led her out of the crowd, out of the club and down the brightly lit streets to his car. He had to help her into the seat, because after a few tries on her own she had ended up on the ground, a puddle of giggles.

He smiled too, at the sheer insanity of the situation, and he wished that he could truly get mad at her. Everyone needed to indulge once in awhile. And she as no different. So, he helped her up, got her settled and, buckled her in.

"Safety first." She piped up, leaning forward, playing with the dials on the radio even though the car wasn't even on. Grissom got in on his side and sat stationary for a moment.

"You're not going to get sick in the car, are you?" He asked, hand poised over the key that was in the ignition.

"Why'd I get sick?" She asked, confused, thrilled that the radio was on, even more excited that she had free reign over it.

"No reason." He said flatly, turning the car on and pulling out of the parking complex. He drove two blocks before Sara had turned up the radio to deafening proportions. Grissom brought his hand down to fiddle with the volume, but Sara batted his hand away.

"Good song!" She shouted, turning it up another fraction.

Grissom's ears adjusted, actually recognizing the song. He turned to gape at his companion for a moment, her head bobbing at the twanging guitar.

"Lynard Skynard?" Grissom called out, 'Sweet Home Alabama' blaring from the speakers. He laughed, an actual laugh, loud enough to capture Sara's attention. She turned her head to stare at him as she sang along. She raised her eyebrows, exaggerating her lips as she sang, prompting him to sing along. He smirked, but sang along anyway, appeasing her. She smiled and turned her eyes back to the road.

The song ended, and another oldie began, but they both ignored it as Sara twiddled with the radio again. She settled on a classic music station, violin strings of Vivaldi filling the large vehicle.

He smiled deeply, amused at her strange musical tastes. She settled her head back in the seat and closed her eyes, allowing the music to wash over her.

"Don't let me fall asleep, okay Griss?" She opened her eyes a fraction and peered at him.

"You could sleep with music this loud to begin with?" He asked, looking back at her for a moment, admiring how innocent she looked on the verge of sleep.

"I can sleep anywhere. I thought you knew that." She said and closed her lids completely, settling back even deeper into the seat, shifting around until she was comfortable.

Grissom drove in silence, glancing over from time to time when he would hear her shift around. As Grissom drove he wondered why things weren't different. How he had landed himself in such an outlandish situation... how strange it was to have a drunk Sara in his vehicle... to have Sara in his car at all after hours.

He pulled in front of her building, waiting to see if she would notice, but she was asleep. He wondered if she even knew that he knew exactly where she lived, knew exactly which window was the window to her living room. That he would drive by, late in the day and just stare up at it, hoping that she would come to the glass and see him sitting there, longing in his eyes.

Reaching over, he touched her shoulder, rousing her from her brief slumber. "Hmmm," she sighed. "I told you not to let me fall asleep!"

"I didn't really have a choice. You were done as soon as you closed your eyes."

"Hmmm, my head hurts." She scrunched her brow and brought her hands up to massage her temples.

"Let's get you inside." He said, throwing the car in park, and getting out to help her out of her side.

He ignored how she clutched at him as they climbed the stairs, and he pretended to be exasperated with her show of adolescent indulgence. He wasn't. His heart clenched and he, all of a sudden, wanted to make everything better. He wanted her sober, clutching to him like she was in her inebriated state.

The alcohol had caught up with her and she was feeling sick. Sick and embarrassed. She was entirely too ashamed to be clutching Grissom's arm, ashamed that she would have been unable to unlock her door without his help.

Once inside her apartment, she suddenly burst into tears, flopping down on her couch. He didn't know what to do, so he just stood before her wait for her to do something that would spur his movement. He was slightly sweaty from all of the pulling and pushing he had been doing and his mouth was parched, at a loss for coherent words.

"I'm sorry." She wept, defenses down do to her inebriation. "I'm sorry Griss, it just hurts, you know? To love you this much and be this close to you and have you pretending like you care." Her mouth choked out the words, lips dry from the booze coursing though her veins. "Oh, god... I didn't mean to say that. Pretend like you didn't hear any of that okay? Okay? Okay."

She coughed and scrunched her brow and tried to turn her head to the side but fell upon the arm of the couch.

The double scotch he had indulged himself in had dulled his nerve endings. Had dulled his consciousness. Grissom stared down at her relaxed body with a sense of wonder. He had never been truly drunk, never had enough to make him feel the way he was sure she felt.

Grissom recalled a quote from a professor he had had in grad school. They had been discussing distilment, for some reason or another and the man at said "There's a business in alcohol, Gil. Alcohol is the most potent verbal lubricant. You only speak the truth when you're drunk."

Grissom smiled, just slightly, just enough for the quirk of the lips to be considered a smile and tilted his head.

He picked her up, a bundle of untold emotions, asleep in his arms and walked with her into her bedroom. With a rare show of loving reverence he deposited her on the bed, sweeping her hair from her face and pulling a blanket from the end of the bed.

At last, he settled in a worn armchair near her bed and leaned back, anticipating the time at which she would awake.


	5. All Of You

Notes: Ashley, Sara's roommate is based on the roommate made up by GeekLoveFan in Facades. There we go, some fan fic consistency.

Also, you people reviewing, I know, I know, I keep saying it makes my day, but to know you keep coming back for more... it amazes me.

I'd also like to forgive the people who's fanfics I've been reading and not reviewing. It's not on purpose, whenever I got to review, the box pops up, freezes, and then promptly freezes my laptop. I'm working on that though!

THANKS!!! To marlou and for pointing out the grammar mistakes. I was slightly rushed to post this chapter. :::glares::: Give me time people! TIME!!!

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Sara's eyes fluttered slowly open, the crust at the sides hindering her waking process. It took her a few moments, but she felt the familiar weight in her head. Her mouth tasted like cotton and warm beer and she attempted to wet it with her tongue, which felt just about as dry as the Gobi desert.

She groaned and rolled over, her head thumping loudly. Again, she moved her tongue against the insides of her mouth attempting to produce saliva but it was no use. Sara was experiencing a sever hangover.

'What the hell did I drink?' She asked herself, but couldn't remember. She groaned again and flung herself over once more, encountering, much to her surprise a pair of blue eyes. She jumped back in her bed, her stomach lurching violently, her breath catching in her throat.

"Hey." he whispered, elbows on his knees, head in his hands as he leaned down in the chair. "How ya feel?"

"Griss, what the hell are you still doing here?!" She exclaimed, the volume of the words shooting straight to her head. "Oh god! Oh, oh god, no, no. I'm sorry." She exclaimed in horror, clamping her eyes shut, running a hand through her hair.

He raised his eyebrows, slightly amused at her reaction to finally noticing the predicament she had gotten herself into.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't want you to drive me home. Ohhh, oh god." Not only was she mortified, her stomach took that moment to take a turn for the worse. She lurched from the bed, running in the direction which he could only assume was the bathroom.

Once the door was firmly closed, Grissom pushed himself out of the chair and moved to the door. He knocked softly, leaning his shoulder against it, crossing his arms. "Sara, Sara are you alright."

Sara mumbled the affirmative and he moved back to the chair. He brushed over his beard with his hand and leaned back, waiting for her to come back.

She did, but didn't look at him, instead, she tossed herself into bed and pulled the covers up over her head. He was surprised, raised his eyebrows again and huffed out a laugh. A second later, she threw her pants out from under the blanket. Grissom watched as the pants flew through the air and smacked against her closet door.

"Ughhhh." She groaned again, sweeping the blankets away from her face to look at him, her face contorted in agony.

Grissom reached to the bedside table and retrieved the water he had left there forgotten. He held it, along with two aspirin out to her. She looked at him with a crinkled brow, did her best to smile lovingly and snatched the pills and water from him.

She nursed the water as if it were a beer and allowed her eyes to slip shut at the pure pleasure the cool water caused slipping down her throat. "Thank you." She said solidly, making sure that he knew she meant it.

"You're welcome." He resumed the position that he had been in when she had awoken. He stared at her, but instead of pulling the blanket over her head, she stared back at him.

Sara was confused. "You can leave you know." She didn't say it to get rid of him, she just wanted him to know that he didn't have to stay on account of her. He smiled and nodded.

"I know." he paused for a moment, and then, taking a deep breath, seemed to be enlivened. "Guess you had fun last night."

"So sore." She said. "But yeah, I had a blast. I'm surprised Greg can actually dance. Might have to have a talk with him about that."

"I'm surprised you can dance like that. Limber." He teased, meeting her eyes head on, admiring the mirth that sprung to her eyes and the flush that rose to her cheeks.

"Well, I had an excellent teacher. Ashley, roommate at Harvard. Crazy." Sara choked out before laying back flat on the pillow.

"Ah. You're apparently a very good student." Grissom's eye glittered as he looked at her. "It would have been fabulous, however, if I had been there to enjoy myself and if you hadn't been three sheets to the wind." He followed, looking down at his clasped hands and then back at her.

"Well, I'll say I'm sorry for having to burden you with taking me home, but I won't apologize for having a good time. If you're going to reprimand me for going out with the guys, then maybe you should wait until work tonight and make it a group thing. I'm not the only one at fault here."

"I'm not saying you are, I'm was just... worried." Grissom said, breaking eye contact with her, looking at her dresser just to get his eyes away from her.

"Worried." Sara scoffed. "There's a first time for everything, now isn't there?"

"First time?" He asked, eyes darting back to her. She was firmly nestled under the blankets, her hair a mess, her face pale... and yet she still enchanted him. "Sara, I worry about you all the time." Grissom spoke, all business, willing her to look at him.

"Really." Sara responded dryly, for obvious reasons. "I guess that's a good thing then." She coughed, held her head, and thought she was going to vomit again. She groaned and looked to Griss with heavy eyes. "I know I'm being a bitch but... can I trouble you for another glass of water?"

He smiled at the pleading nature of her voice and disappeared into her kitchen. Sara allowed her eyes to slip closed and sighed, thanking whomever that Grissom was with her, though she wished it had been under more exciting circumstances. Sure, he was in her bedroom, but not in her bed. Sara frowned, and he returned with the water, handing the cold glass to her.

Her hands clamped around the cold glass and she shivered. Grissom got the uncontrollable urge to crawl into bed with her, hold her, nurse her back to health. He should have been mad that he had to go out of his way to... aw hell, he was so confused.

"This is severely strange, I just want to point that out." Sara said in between gulps of water. "I mean, you don't talk to me for... what, three months and then you bring me home? Sit in my room, talk to me? This is strange, it's not like you." She gulped down some more water. "Not your character."

Grissom pressed his hands together, leaned his lips against them and thought about what she had said. It was true, everything that he had done in the past eight hours was completely unlike him. He should have been reprimanding her, he shouldn't have even bothered to get worried when Nick said she was crying-

"Hey, Nicky mentioned you were crying last night." He reminded her, wanting to know what that whole bit was about.

Sara smiled bitterly. "Yeah. It just happens sometimes when I drink. Happens to a lot of people. I remember one time, back in San Fran that-"

"Sara." He cut her off, she was avoiding his question.

She sighed heavily, flitted her eyes from him to her window. "Yeah, yeah. Cath had my phone, Nick had my phone... and all I wanted to do was talk to you. It's stupid, I just get emotional when I drink I guess."

All she wanted to do was talk to him? "All you wanted to do was talk to me?" He pressed on.

"Ugh, this is so embarrassing. Okay, how do I say this? I figured, though I was pretty gone, that I could say what I needed to say to you and then blame it on the alcohol later. I just knew how great it would feel to get it all off my chest, and not having to say it to your face, though completely cowardly, was a bonus. "

"Huh." Again, Grissom leaned back in the chair, attempting to dissect her words. "You're not still drunk now are you?" The thought struck him suddenly.

Sara nearly laughed, but quelled his fear. "I didn't have that much to drink, Griss."

"Good, well, what were you going to tell me. I'm here now, and I'm not going to judge you." He nearly smacked himself for how cliché he sounded.

"It's not important now." Sara attempted to brush it off, holding off on burying herself under her covers to ward off his questions. They'd probably still be asked anyway.

"Sara, it's important if you think you need to get drunk to talk to me. You can be honest with me wh-... Sara, just be honest with me."

"Okay, let's see. You're a bastard and sometimes I can't stand you. You treat me like I don't exist but you tell people that I'm a close friend. I can't stop thinking about you even when I'm away from the office, and no matter how hard I try I can't help but wonder what your lips feel like, what you're skin feels like it, what it feels like to hold- oh just never mind."

Grissom got up, sat on the bed and placed his hand in her hair, stroking it slowly. Her eyes widened to just about the size of saucers when he did so.

"You're right, I am a bastard, but it's only because I can't really have what I want, and if I got it, I wouldn't know what to do with it."

"What would that be?" Sara asked him indignantly.

He smiled and tucked a long strand behind her ear. She shivered.

"You. All of you."


	6. In The Night

A/N: Last chapter. I know, so sad, but I have a ton of other stuff I'm writing (including a ficcie with GeekLoveFan which will be fabby).

Oh yeah and I LOVE THE JORDAN'S FURNITURE GUYS!!!

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"I'm realizing now just how inappropriate it is for me to be laying here without any pants on."

Grissom shook his head, not quite sure he had heard her correctly. He had all but bared his soul and she was talking about... "What?"

"I have no pants on." The bundle of blankets that was Sara replied, as it was the most normal thing in the world. She smoothed her hair out, licking her lips, looking to him expectantly. For the first time in years, Gil Grissom didn't quite know what to say.

"Alright..." So she was going to pretend that she hadn't heard what he had said. How very childish. Then again, after all her had put her through emotionally, he supposed he didn't blame her. Grissom was just glad that she didn't shoot him down immediately. "I should go."

Gil put his hands on his knees and pushed himself to a standing position.

"And, just to let you know, as much as I hate to admit it, you've had all of me since... since I can't even remember when. It just appears like I don't have much to give." Sara shrugged, neither sad nor self-deprecating, simply telling him the truth.

Feet rooted to the spot, Grissom stood there, staring at her, once again at a loss for what to say to her. He was sure that he should expound on his previous statement, tell her his deepest wished, desire. But he just stood there, mouth slightly agape, staring down at her prone form.

"You can go now if you'd like." Her arms stretched above her head, pulling her muscles into a more comfortable state. Her eyes squeezed closed as she moved over the sheets, twisting her body in a cat-like manner. It captivated him more than it should have.

"Do I have to?" His throat squeezed out, voice full of longing, wanting to reach out and feel her skin as the muscles moved beneath it.

She paused, hands clasped over her head and looked at him, sufficiently surprised. "Not if you don't want to."

"I don't."

Her smile took a few moments to break, but when it did, it morphed into an amazing grin. Suddenly, her hand shot out and drew the comforter back, holding it out for him. She raised an eyebrow to tempt him, yet he stood still, as if weighing his options.

"You're not wearing any pants."

"Sherlock, your skills of deduction are impeccable." Her voice was flat, her eyebrow raised. "Does that bother you Grissom? Or does that threaten you."

"Neither, I'm just reminding you." he said, standing by her bed, waiting.

"Fully aware. Now get in, but take off your shoes first." She warned, waiting for him to do as he was told. He shot her a 'you've gotta be kidding me look' and slipped off his loafers. Every cell in Grissom's brain screamed against him getting any closer to her. But he did, crawling into bed.

She beamed at his as he laid back uncomfortably on her pillows. She perked herself up on one arm to watch him. He stared at the ceiling and twiddled his thumbs. "Relax." She breathed, simply watching him, captivated in her innocence. She stroked her hand over his forehead, watching as his eyes fluttered. "Sleep Griss." Sara whispered, moving down under the covers, snuggling near him, but not on him.

He snapped out of his paralysis long enough to snake an arm around her waist and drop a kiss in her hair. Sara's face sit up and she looked up at him to find him smiling. Sara quickly reached around to unhook her bra and discarded it by throwing it across the room. She settled down into bed and allowed herself to drift to sleep.

Grissom watched her sleep for several moments wondering just why he was doing exactly what he was doing. His lids closed and he too drifted off, comforted by the warm weight in his arms.

He awoke, his neck tingling. He brushed a hand quickly over his beard and shifted around in the bed, coming into contact with another warm body. Grissom startled awake, acquainting himself with his surroundings, reminding himself just where he was.

Something was pressed against his neck and he blinked rapidly in order to acquaint himself with his surroundings. It occurred to him then that there were lips pressed against him, and they began to roam. A groan slipped out from between his teeth, and he made a move to flip over, to stop her, but her hands on his shoulders stilled him.

Her tongue traced the base of his skull, just below his hairline, for a moment, before detouring to suck on the flesh at the side of his neck. "Sara, if you don't stop-"

"Who said anything about stopping?" She mumbled, pulling on his shoulders so that he was laying flat on his back. She smiled down at him as he settled back and stared at her with dark eyes. "Can I kiss you?" She asked him quietly.

He nodded, barely perceptible. Sara smiled and moved in, brushing his lips with hers softly. One of his hands came up to touch the side of her face gently, brushing over the skin there. Her tongue snuck out and tangled with hers fitfully, and he reciprocated with fervor, all the while, screaming at his brain to stop telling him to stop.

Her pantless legs swung over him, their lips still connected, as she straddled him. Grissom sucked in a breath when she settled down on top of him and she took the opportunity to grasp his bottom lip between her teeth and tug. Grissom wanted to growl, but he laughed instead, unable to remember the last time he had felt quite as good.

"Shirt off." Sara ordered, teeth still wrapped around his lip. He chuckled and complied, ridding himself of the hindering fabric. Biting her lip, Sara smiled, moving her palms over the newly-bared skin. Her teeth skimmed over his collarbone, sucking and licking, his breathing speeding up to a point he didn't think was particularly healthy.

"The pants can go to, if you don't mind, so we're even."

Grissom raised his eyebrow and he pulled at her shirt with nimble fingers. She grinned at him, leaned down and whispered in his ear: "Ah, but you forget what I'm not wearing underneath." Licking the shell quickly, she pulled back, finding his eyes incredibly wide... with lust. "So, the pants please good sir."

Pursing his lips, he did as he was told, she leaning off of him until his slacks and socks were somewhere on the floor, along with a pile of her own cotton garments.

Straddling him once more, she flexed her thighs around his, dizzy with happiness and lust. His hands reached up to grab hers and bring her down on him once more so he could capture her lips. Surprised at his sudden action, she smiled against his lips, giving his tongue immediately access to hers.

Hands were everywhere; her back, her hair, her hips, her breasts. Grissom took the opportunity to rid her of her top, throwing it to the end of the bed where it landed forgotten.

His hands slipped over her cheeks and he gazed into her eyes for a moment. "You're stopping for me?"

She nodded.

"How long have you been waiting for me?" He whispered, a soft finger slipping over her cheekbone.

"Hmm, would 'since the day I met you' be too cheeky?" She sighed.

"Yes. It would." He smiled and toyed with her hair a bit, his eyes flitting all over her face, admiring the shadows from the dim light in the bedroom.

"Well then, let's see..." She began loudly, screwing up her face in an exaggerated expression of thinking. "Carry the three... about... seven, no, wait... nine years."

Grissom was startled, that whole time... He had thought surely her feelings had advanced after she had arrived in Las Vegas. He was astonished, and his face showed it, so she laughed. Still, he looked at her, shocked.

"Waited... that whole time. Just for me?"

She smiled softly at him, kissing him slowly and deeply before responding. "For you."

His smile was slow to appear, but it did, and when it became a grin he flipped her over quickly, kissing her deeper and harder that he had yet to. Responding in kind, Sara dove her hands into his hair, unable to let him go.

As his hands skated over her breasts, her hips, and rid her of her panties, she moaned, deeply. "Honey, honey, honey." He whispered, somewhere near her feet. "You're gorgeous."

Despite herself she flushed, laughed throatily, but was cut off when his lips meandered between her legs. Smiling against her flesh when she jumped, he held her gently down, hands on her hips. Taking his time, as he usually did, he made sure to explore every aspect of her.

For a bit, she thought it laborious, she was far past aroused. But it wasn't about her being ready for him, it was about Grissom knowing her body, finding comfort in it. She then realized that until he was comfortable with her body, when he trusted it, he would continue. Consequently Sara surrendered to his lips and tongue and hands.

Some time later, what time she wasn't sure, he pressed himself into her body and once sheathed in her warmth he allowed himself to speak her name for the first time before they had begun. "Ssssara." He ground out, directly into her ear, causing her eyes to flutter closed.

"Next time." Grissom whispered out, halting in his movements. "I need you to look at me this time honey."

And they made love, experimentally, eyes locked on each other so that he knew she was feeling everything he was doing to her. For her.

Minutes, hours, some time later, they laid on the bed, Grissom much in the same position he had taken when he had first laid in her bed. Sara ran her hand over his chest, fully awake. He turned to her, both of their faces blank, expressionless.

But he wove her hand in his and gulped. She smiled a little. He relaxed a little.

They didn't bother to go back to sleep.


End file.
